You, Me & a Bottle of Wine...
I'm sure everyone, yes, EV-ERY-ONE has heard of how "marriage isn't easy" and you have to "work hard at it" blah blah blah...GUESS WHAT?! It's true! You DO have to work super hard at it! I've been married to my best friend going on 3 years (September 14th :D) and unlike most people who post about how wonderful and perfect their marriage is, i'm going to talk about just a few of the difficulties we've been faced with and how we've dealt and are STILL learning to "deal" with. I by no means am any sort of expert but I thought, heyyyy there may be some woman or man out there reading my blog whom this may be of some help. "ME" TIME
Giray and I work together, live together (in a very small 1 bdrm) and share one car. This as you can imagine can make it difficult to have "me time" or "alone time". I love my husband more than anything BUT it's important I have some time to myself, whether it be 30 minutes at the salon getting my nails done or working out alone. This time for myself helps me gather my thoughts, relax and focus on my own person. This of course goes both ways. Making sure each other has at least a little time for themselves is good for a healthy relationship especially when you happen to work together and share a car, lol, i'm not sure how we haven't killed each other yet! JK ;) ! With a little "me time" here and there all will be well :) .
I cannot stress how important this is. As I said before, Giray and I work together so we are literally almost ALWAYS together. Again, don't get me wrong i'm lucky to work with him but it can at times create a routine to where we see each other all day we forget to spend quality time with each other. What I mean is, seeing each other at work or driving to work can also become part of the routine which can throw romance straight out the window. This happened to us and the second I realized it I was like WHOA?! STOP!! RIGHT NOW!! lol. It had been weeks since we last dressed up and went out for a nice dinner. It's bananas! There's absolutely no reason for this, especially since we don't have kids...yet ;) hehe. So we decided we'd go on a date Friday after work. We picked a couple of new places this trampoline place (which by the way was an extremely good workout) and this super delish restaurant called The General Public (at The Rim, order the hummus...trust me) and then we went to have drinks at one of our old spots (Green Lantern) and danced. It was fun, romantic and brought us back to life a little.
LISTEN TO EACH OTHER
This is something that Giray and I have been working on. It sounds like the biggest cliche ever but it's not easy, especially for me and sometimes for him. With social media and all these crazy apps out there it can difficult to be fully engaged in each others conversation. Whether you're scrolling on Instagram or playing Clash of Clans and think you can multitask and listen and play/scroll at the same time, NOPE, WRONG! This has created full on arguments & fights and we all know arguments are ZERO fun. When you're with each other the best thing to do is to put the phone down. I totally understand how difficult that can be these days but if it means having a better relationship and ZERO fights, i'm all in! We've been trying to work on this and I think it's getting a little better each day, as long as we remind each other, haha.
THOSE 3 LITTLE WORDS
Saying I love you when you're mad or upset with your partner can be difficult but it's in those moments you that need to hear those 3 little words the most, ESPECIALLY before going to bed. I've been guilty of holding back those words because I was upset and in the morning I always regret it because the vibe is still a little off. Ending a hard day with an I love you can sometimes be all you need to hear to make things feel better. It's cheesy but important and it's something Giray and I are also working on...yes this too, haha.
Now, this one is important for both ladies and gents. As a woman, hearing a little "You look beautiful today" or anything sweet really boosts my self esteem, gives me that little extra burst of joy and energy and over all just makes me feel awesome. I'm sure this does the exact same for guys. So people, help your special someone feel like the most special ever by giving them a little compliment, whether it be in person, through text, a call, whatever, just out with that sappiness I know is in there...somewhere.
Well, there ya have it guys. I know there's tons more wisdom out there, so feel free to share any of your marriage/relationship tips below. Nighty night my beautiful people!